I was determined that my irritation at being disturbed from my first good sleep
of the summer was not going to colour my conversation with her.  Someone had
opened a window in the early hours, and the room was cold but the smells of
early flowers together with the dusty rays of sunlight gave the big sitting
room a garden feel.  The long brown pile carpet tickled my toes as I went to 
look for her.

I paused to breathe before opening the door to the connected dining room. The
brass handle felt more solid than I did, but it gave easily when I pushed it.

"You look grumpy", she said, sitting over toast and a book.

This first assault had been expected, and as such I dealt with it easily.
"I'm tired.  A motorbike passed and it woke me."

She put down the newspaper and looked at me over the rims over her silver 
spectacles.  "That's not what I mean."  She started reading again, but I could
tell by her eyes she wasn't really reading.  "Are you going to see him today?"

"Not again, please."  She always forced the issue, and it had always been this way.
She had grown up in a large noisy family of four sisters and a brother and she
had learned early to push and push.  With all of them pushing, none of them had
been quiet long enough to feel pushed.  But I had grown up as an only child, where
whole days sometimes passed without a word being said.  When I was pushed, I gave.
Until I had met Ros during a summer very like this one, and I fell in love with her
ability to make noise and bustle wherever she went.  Much later, I learned I had
missed the chaos in the bustle.

"You know he'll only go without you, and we need the money."

"You need the money.  I'm fine."  But I was no use at barbs.  They came out sounding
pathetic and contrived.  If she knew you were trying to hurt her, it was a wasted
effort.  I changed the subject.  "I suppose you'll be with the gang today."

"Of course.  Why wouldn't I?"

I shrugged.  "I thought you might want to come with me to look at the studio."

"You do it, if you like it we can talk about it later."

What she meant was, if I like it, she can argue with me until I get fed up with
the idea.  If I happen not to like it, then the problem vanishes for her. During
the days when the gang were out, I had never been able to tempt her away to do
something else.  "I could always take Andrew to look at it, kill two birds with
one stone."

She waved, since it didn't matter.


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